It’s no secret that I’m absolute trash but what I’m trash for changes all the time. I’ve been in a ton of different fandoms and I’ve realised that most of them actually played quite an important part in my life and I definitely wouldn’t be the person I am without them. Sure some of them seem a little cringey now that I look back on them but I wouldn’t change anything so I decided to write a blog post about which fandoms have impacted on my life.
My Chemical Romance
The first fandom I ever joined was the My Chemical Romance fandom. In my first RE class at Secondary School I met a girl who loved MCR and I really wanted to be her friend. When I started listening to them I realised I actually already enjoyed some of their songs (My sister had played me ‘Famous Last Words’ before and whenever I went over I begged her to put on ‘the pie song’ for me. Long story.) Before I knew it I was absolute trash, I’d even argue I was a bigger fan by this point than the girl I’d met in RE who quickly became my best friend at the time.
I became fully absorbed in My Chemical Romance, this is embarrassing now but I was a big fan of writing so eventually I started to write FanFiction – I actually got a bit of a reputation on the site I was on and ended up making a lot of friends. I also made friends through their website and I’d add them all on MSN then every so often we’d have ‘MCR Parties’ on a Friday night which was basically a lot of us in one group chat just having a good time. I actually met one of my best friends Penina through FanFiction and we’re still good friends today.
I ended up seeing MCR twice live and made friends at both concerts, I met Emma at the concert in Manchester and we met Kane at the concert in Birmingham (I’m pretty sure he legit ditched his friends and just hung out with us) and honestly I loved MCR so much. When the ‘Danger Days’ album was released I put together my own Killjoy outfit and one Friday night I even ended up doing an MSN roleplay with some MCR fans where we were all killjoys – see I know it’s a bit sad now but fourteen year old me was living for it.
I even made my Mom take me, Jasmine and Raechel to Birmingham for a ‘Killjoy Meet-up’ where we met other My Chemical Romance fans and walked around singing MCR songs. Someone filmed the day but I don’t think we ever found an edited video but we did take tons of photos – which although are a little embarrassing now are also really funny.
Growing up is difficult enough but I feel like I did an okay job because I had my fandom from when I turned twelve until the group eventually split when I was sixteen. Luckily I wasn’t as big of a fan by then so I wasn’t too devastated… I say as if I didn’t tear down all my posters and chuck them in the bin upon hearing they’d split. I’m known for being a little dramatic.
I still like My Chemical Romance a little bit and I’m still holding onto the hopes that they will return next year (I read a theory that they will and I’m clinging onto it) and honestly, I’m glad I grew up as a My Chemical Romance fan because I made so many friendships and memories that really help me throughout my teenage years.
I think part of the reason that my parting with My Chemical Romance was a bit easier was probably because I’d become a massive Supernatural fan a few months before they split so my main fandom at the time of their break-up was Supernatural. I mentioned meeting my friend Penina on an MCR FanFic site – well, we ended up adding each other on Facebook and for a while we would literally talk to each other from the moment we woke up to the moment we went to sleep. She was already a big Supernatural fan and kept recommending the show and I’d began to see a lot of Supernatural fans emerging on Tumblr. After one disastrous Christmas I headed up town and decided to have a DVD day. I bought season one of Supernatural and headed back home.
It’s crazy now because I just don’t have the attention span but I put the DVD on at about 12PM and at 1AM I was still watching it. I was immediately absorbed and it was fun finally being able to talk to Penina about it. For the rest of the Christmas holidays I would head back up town, buy the next box set then head back home and watch it until stupid o’clock in the morning until I eventually ran out of money. I got the seventh box set as an Easter and I’d finally caught up with the series! So I had to watch new episodes on crappy websites that were probably downloading a ton of viruses but it was worth it to watch Supernatural. I used to get up at stupid o’clock in the morning before school to watch them to ensure that when I got home I wouldn’t come across any spoilers. I took that show seriously.
This escalated when I realised there was a yearly Supernatural convention held in the UK called ‘Asylum’. This convention was held in May and even better it wasn’t in London or somewhere far away from me, it was held in Birmingham of all places! Birmingham is just under an hour away by train for me and is super easy to get to so I was ecstatic. Unfortunately that first year I didn’t get a ticket because it sold out but Penina got one so I showed up and followed her round all day and got to meet some of the cast. Then the next year and for the next three, maybe four years I went to every Asylum convention and gradually met quite a lot of the cast.
Supernatural was another fandom where I ended up making a ton of new friends and having some really awesome experiences and I held onto this fandom throughout my time at college and honestly I don’t know what I would’ve done without Supernatural. I got into this show after one of the worst Christmas’ ever and I was still in the middle of my lonely Secondary School phase (I had a few months where I spent every weekend alone and generally hated myself). The cast were also always super nice whenever I met them and I just loved Supernatural so much.
My experience as a K-Pop fan is kind of different because I haven’t really made any internet friends through the K-Pop fandom but I have done more than I ever thought I would. Because I’m a K-Pop fan I ended up visiting Paris and Amsterdam to attend concerts and I’m also going to South Korea later this year, somewhere I never really had an interest in going before. It was also thanks to K-Pop that I got friendly with a couple of girls in my dorm at university because they saw my Girls’ Generation Facebook header.
It was also thanks to K-Pop that I stopped having a ‘bad year’. I’m sorry to talk about it again so I’ll make it quick – I got called on stage at a 24K concert, they sang to me, I realised life wasn’t all that bad, you can read all about it here because I wrote a proper long post about it and how I felt and everything but honestly I just still can’t believe it.
So although K-Pop has been there for me in a different way to the first two fandoms it’s still had a big impact on my life and honestly I’m glad I became a K-Pop fan because I think it made me and my friends a bit more adventurous and I just love the music so much.
Dan and Phil
I can’t remember if I talked about this before or not but when I went to university I didn’t have a great time, I felt a bit rubbish all the time and I just didn’t like it. So I was thrilled to come home one weekend so I could go and see Dan & Phil live with their stage show ‘The Amazing Tour is Not on Fire’. It was on in Birmingham so I came back to Telford and the next day went to Birmingham to meet them. And honestly, they were amazing. The show was so good and Dan and Phil themselves were so lovely.
Then I had to head back to London because obviously I had to go back to uni at some point. But luckily Dan and Phil announced a couple more shows so I bought another VIP ticket to see them one last time in London. When I went to the show I hadn’t really spoken to anyone in a few days, I hadn’t had any human contact and hugging them was the first proper interaction I’d had in maybe two weeks. So once they’d signed my stuff and we’d taken a selfie I quickly asked if I could get one more hug to which they both obliged. I suppose to them I was just one weird fan amongst many who wanted another hug but to me, who was feeling so, so lonely at the time, that one last hug was everything.
Even when I wasn’t meeting them they were there for me at university. I’d make myself breakfast and watch their videos. If my room mates were being loud in the middle of the night I’d put my headphones on and watch one of their videos. I’d go over to Jess’ and we’d watched their videos together. Their book was also released shortly after I went to uni and I remember being so sad when I got to the end of it because that book also helped me in my dark moments.
I didn’t realise it at the time but Dan and Phil were there when I felt like I had no one and honestly I feel like I owe them so much because they helped me through that difficult time. Ultimately I made the decision to leave university but I’d have left a lot sooner without Dan and Phil.
For a while I was a massive Achievement Hunter fan then slowly I stopped watching less and less of their content until suddenly I became a massive fan again towards the start of last year. Just as well because unfortunately my Grandad passed away in early February. The day after everyone stayed at home and we kept the curtains closed. It was suffocating being around everyone in the darkness so I mostly stayed in my room and watched Achievement Hunter videos. Even now, no matter how bad my day is I can always rely on Achievement Hunter to cheer me up.
Last year I wanted to go to RTX London so badly but unfortunately I was in New York (tragic I know) and this year I figured that if they did come back it’d be around the same date so I’d be in Japan. Luckily they’re actually holding it mid-September and even luckier, general sale tickets go on sale on Pay Day. I really hope I meet at least one person from Achievement Hunter because they’ve honestly helped me smile in some of the hardest times. I’m praying there’s a decent line-up because I’ve wanted to meet Achievement Hunter for so long and I’d be so excited. I really hope I get a ticket.
So as you can see I’ve had fandom around me for the times when I’ve needed it the most and I honestly wouldn’t change anything. I’m trash but I’m honestly fine with that due to the memories I’ve made and I’m sure I’ll continue to make.
I’m gonna tell one last story before I end this post. I used to be a big fan of Sherlock so whilst I was at university I discovered Benedict Cumberbatch was a doing a show at some theatre, I can’t remember what it’s called now but obviously tickets were sold out and the only ones left were stupidly expensive. However the venue sold I think it was forty tickets a day if you were at theatre for 10AM. So on the first day I got up at 6AM to get to the theatre and they sold out so the next day I got up at 5AM to get tickets but unfortunately they sold out again so I gave up. What a sad story. So I never got to see Benedict Cumberbatch alive and in the flesh.