I’m the girl on the left. The girl on the right was one of my best friend’s at the time. I couldn’t find a photo of just me because I wasn’t big into taking selfies at the time. I have no idea what I have scribbled on my face but no doubt it had something to with My Chemical Romance, the band I was absolutely obsessed with at the time. Honestly, I would’ve happily talked about My Chemical Romance all the time if it had been up to me. I loved them.
Dear Thirteen-Year-Old Me,
It’s been seven nearly eight years and things are extremely different. For one you’re not in school anymore. I imagine now it feels like you’ll never leave but you will and you’ll suddenly find that there are things about Secondary School that you miss an awful lot. And of course some things that you’ve never been happier to leave behind.
First of all, I know you’ve been sobbing to Mom about how badly you want black hair because until you fulfil that you won’t be a ‘true emo’ but it’s not a great idea. When you eventually get bored of it, and trust me you will, it’ll be so hard to get a new brighter colour. I know the idea of anything colourful will repel you at the moment but one day you’ll learn to love it. Stick with the brown hair and blonde highlights. It really suits you and the moment you dye it black you’ll never get it back.
Secondly, stop obsessing over the boys in your year. Honestly, none of them are that great and they’re not worth your time. I know right now it feels like you ‘need’ a boyfriend but one day you’ll realise that it’s not actually that high of a priority anymore. Enjoy the time with your friends and stop getting so stressed out. You’re not ugly or gross if you don’t have a boyfriend, stop acting like you are!
Thirdly, you will get over your My Chemical Romance obsession. You keep insisting right now that you won’t and that you’ll love them forever but you won’t. Okay, you’ll still like them but definitely not on the same level you do right now. Also, they’re gonna break up. So prepare for that.
Now this one’s an important one. You know your best friend? That girl you tell everything to, who you trust more than anything and who you couldn’t imagine being without? You’re not friends with her anymore. Here’s the thing – she’s not being honest with you. I’m sure she’s being honest about a whole bunch of things but there’s also things that she’s not telling you. And then one day you’ll suddenly find that she’s more interested in her new boyfriend than you. And you will spend the next few months feeling extremely, extremely lonely.
And that’s okay. You’ll learn a lot in those few months. You’ll learn how to be by yourself. You’ll gain some independence. It will suck, you’ll hate your life and you’ll feel like you don’t have any friends at all but it will end and you’ll have learnt so much from it.
Here’s the good news. You will find new friends and you’ll wonder how you lived without them in your life. You’ll find you can be more honest with them then you were with your current best friends. There are things you feel like you can’t tell her, aren’t there? Well you can tell these girls anything and they would never tell anyone else. They’re into the same things as you and you’ll end up going on some great trips with them and doing completely stupid and questionable things but you’re going to love every second. Trust me!
The only other advice I have is to stop obsessing what everyone else thinks and just have fun. Have as much fun as you possibly can and don’t regret anything.
Love Twenty-Year-Old You